Miscarriage

I lost two babies on
September 11th,
1990.
I delivered them. They were not alive.
I never saw them beyond the blood.
I have their photos
But I am afraid to look.
Twin A and Twin B.
This day is never easy.
How ironic.
My twin towers.
My 9/11.
We all fall down.

6 thoughts on “Miscarriage

  1. Thank you and hugs to you, my friend.
    Ironically, I just lost my first response to you.
    Trying not to laugh.

    I had begun my 5th month.
    One boy. One girl.

    I felt everything.
    I remember everything.

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  2. For me it was 2 also, but apart, one in 1982, one in 1995. First term, and each horrible in their own way. I’m so sorry for your terrible loss. Luckily we have our other two miracles like you as well.

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    • Lori dear. Your response went to spam. I do not know why. I was just noodling around here and I saw a comment from a “Lori.” I didn’t even know the Lori was you before I allowed the comment to post.
      I don’t think I knew about your two miscarriages. Thank you for sharing this with me. Sometimes I feel people don’t want to hear about it. They don’t know what to say. Back when this happened in 1990, I sort of fell to my knees in agony when people told me this was “G-d’s will” or “Not meant to be.” I felt as if I caused the miscarriage. Guilt lasted until when… well, I still feel it. {}
      Thank g-d for miracles indeed. My daughters are here because the twins I lost did not make it. Hard to make sense of it all but that is the small comfort I give myself to cope with the lifelong pain from what I experienced.
      Love to you and your boys. (Matt included.) xoxo

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    • Thank you for letting me know you care. It’s a pain that endures, despite years of distance from the tragedy. I’m a mom to two beautiful children today. I have long said what I lost brought me the joys I have. I thank those lost twins for giving me my daughters. ()

      Like

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